Tuesday, July 13, 2010

A Sister Gone...loss

I am so sad. Broken hearted. I feel heavy, like I could sink into the seat I am sitting in. My step-sister, less than a year older than me, whom I grew up with from the age of 8... is gone. She finally could no longer handle the fight she was engaged in with cancer. She has been seriously ill for two years now. A few years ago, she had breast cancer. Went through the radiation and a masectomy. It came back. Now, her family must go on without her. It's a terrible loss. She has three children and a husband left behind. My heart is the most heavy for her youngest, only 9, like my own daughter. How can she even begin to understand the enormity of it all, let alone deal with the loss of the most important person in her life. It's tragic.

I remember when we were both pregnant with our daughters. Kathy was a month behind me in her pregnancy. She called me before she told anyone else...so upset. The last thing she wanted was to be pregnant again. She had two other children, almost grown. I remember telling her that things happen for a reason and that her new child would bring her joy. We talked for a while about it. I told her we could make it fun, being pregnant at the same time, together. I think I made her feel better about it.

My step sister and I were not really close. Due to family drama's there was always a little bit of a wedge there. It wasn't personal towards me...it just was what it was. That often happens with blended...broken...families. Still, she and my other step-sister were and are the closest thing I will ever have to siblings. Just because we weren't always that close, doesn't make my loss any less. I grew up with her...though in different households. I share so many memories, experiences, history with her. I will truely miss her more than I can say.

Kathy was what I call a gentle soul. She had a sweet disposition. She was quiet, but not a shrinking violet by any means. She touched so many people with her gentleness.

I am so sad at her loss. There will be such a large hole left in our family.

Please pray for her family in their time of need...